The Couples Institute

by Peter Pearson, Ph.D.

A lot of motivational speakers say we attract what we want. However, the more accurate statement is we attract what we focus on and what we take action on.

So let’s take a deeper, scientific look at the power of focus. Wherever you focus your attention, your brain makes neuronal connections. Create a new objective, and continuing to focus on it creates new circuitry in your brain. It is like creating a new tributary off a main river.

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By Ellyn Bader, Ph.D. and Peter Pearson, Ph.D.

“My partner never wants to talk about anything important.”

“I feel like running for cover when my wife gets defensive.”

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By Ellyn Bader, Ph.D. and Peter Pearson, Ph.D.

Today we’d like to challenge a “sacred cow” of relationships: love. Isn’t love generally accepted to be “The greatest thing in the world?” For many people, love is both the purpose and the goal of life.

Is there anything more important than love to make a relationship grow and thrive?

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