Comments for Marriage Counseling - Marriage Advice - Marriage Problem Solving http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog Thu, 25 Feb 2010 04:27:02 -0600 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.6 hourly 1 Comment on Is This the Formula for Marriage Success? by Pete Pearson http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/168/is-this-the-formula-for-marriage-success/comment-page-1/#comment-702 Pete Pearson Thu, 25 Feb 2010 04:27:02 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=168#comment-702 Ursula - I'm working on a column which has to do with commitment to change vs wanting to change. The extraordinary number of inter dependencies in a relationship creates limitations on how much one person can change a relationship. I don't think there is any relationship on earth more emotionally complex than in a couple. all for now Pete Ursula – I’m working on a column which has to do with commitment to change vs wanting to change. The extraordinary number of inter dependencies in a relationship creates limitations on how much one person can change a relationship. I don’t think there is any relationship on earth more emotionally complex than in a couple.
all for now
Pete

]]> Comment on Is This the Formula for Marriage Success? by Marilyn http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/168/is-this-the-formula-for-marriage-success/comment-page-1/#comment-700 Marilyn Wed, 24 Feb 2010 23:06:36 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=168#comment-700 There doesn't seem to be much of this happening anymore but it is my belief that making your partner your priority in your life...each making the other a priority...knowing that you are...them knowing that they are...is the key to staying connected. There doesn’t seem to be much of this happening anymore but it is my belief that making your partner your priority in your life…each making the other a priority…knowing that you are…them knowing that they are…is the key to staying connected.

]]> Comment on Is This the Formula for Marriage Success? by Annette Pinto http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/168/is-this-the-formula-for-marriage-success/comment-page-1/#comment-698 Annette Pinto Tue, 23 Feb 2010 17:55:27 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=168#comment-698 My thoughts are that to make a relationship work, one has to accept that dynamics are co-created between both people. Then both people have a responsibility for owning their individual part in the conflicts or misunderstandings that occur. It's easy to blame others, however more productive to look inward. My thoughts are that to make a relationship work, one has to accept that dynamics are co-created between both people. Then both people have a responsibility for owning their individual part in the conflicts or misunderstandings that occur. It’s easy to blame others, however more productive to look inward.

]]> Comment on Is This the Formula for Marriage Success? by Carolyn Brown http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/168/is-this-the-formula-for-marriage-success/comment-page-1/#comment-697 Carolyn Brown Tue, 23 Feb 2010 13:56:37 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=168#comment-697 Can't make that week-end. Hope you can find another place to continue to help couples stay connected! Keep in touch to let us know. Carolyn Can’t make that week-end. Hope you can find another place to continue to help couples stay connected! Keep in touch to let us know.

Carolyn

]]> Comment on Is This the Formula for Marriage Success? by Ursula http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/168/is-this-the-formula-for-marriage-success/comment-page-1/#comment-696 Ursula Tue, 23 Feb 2010 11:27:21 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=168#comment-696 Dear Pete, The formula is absolutely right. I "get" that I can only "see" my partner through my own distorted lens. I am determined to clear that lens. That is as far as I have gotten in this AS-NT relationship. Now it's time for me to figure out the specifics. Thanks for your post. Ursula Dear Pete,
The formula is absolutely right. I “get” that I can only “see” my partner through my own distorted lens.
I am determined to clear that lens.
That is as far as I have gotten in this AS-NT relationship. Now it’s time for me to figure out the specifics.
Thanks for your post.
Ursula

]]> Comment on Is This the Formula for Marriage Success? by Andrea http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/168/is-this-the-formula-for-marriage-success/comment-page-1/#comment-695 Andrea Tue, 23 Feb 2010 07:26:53 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=168#comment-695 Hi Pete, I'm about to get married, (PS your help a few years ago and your class got us this far! Thank you) and I'd have to add transparency and a willingness to be vulnerable. And when the vulnerablility is seen in the other, to sit gently with it. And staying in the moment. And recognizing what is going right and build on that! I'm sure I'll continue thinking on this one! Thanks Again, Andrea Hi Pete,
I’m about to get married, (PS your help a few years ago and your class got us this far! Thank you) and I’d have to add transparency and a willingness to be vulnerable. And when the vulnerablility is seen in the other, to sit gently with it.
And staying in the moment. And recognizing what is going right and build on that!
I’m sure I’ll continue thinking on this one!
Thanks Again, Andrea

]]> Comment on Is This the Formula for Marriage Success? by Ursula http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/168/is-this-the-formula-for-marriage-success/comment-page-1/#comment-694 Ursula Tue, 23 Feb 2010 03:01:47 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=168#comment-694 Pete, It would be really, really helpful if you wrote an article that detailed the specific attitudes and determination required for a neuro typical partner to develop a fulfilling relationship with a partner with Aspergers Syndrome. With Sincere Regards, Ursula Pete,
It would be really, really helpful if you wrote an article that detailed the specific attitudes and determination required for a neuro typical partner to develop a fulfilling relationship with a partner with Aspergers Syndrome.
With Sincere Regards,
Ursula

]]> Comment on The Five Demons of Couples’ Communication by wilhelmina http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/136/the-five-demons-of-couples-communication/comment-page-1/#comment-687 wilhelmina Thu, 04 Feb 2010 10:05:24 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=136#comment-687 myhusband & I are still not talking to each other. I feel we are drifting apart even more each day. Each day I pray to be a better person, to be at least a friend to my husband.. I feel sad and frustrated not to be able to get the recipe to my it right. Reading and knowing what can be done is great..it helps me go by somehow, but I dont understand why I cannot put at least one corrective move into practice, I would like to send this to my husband but he does not believe in these things.. all he knows is that I am a horrible person. myhusband & I are still not talking to each other. I feel we are drifting apart even more each day. Each day I pray to be a better person, to be at least a friend to my husband.. I feel sad and frustrated not to be able to get the recipe to my it right. Reading and knowing what can be done is great..it helps me go by somehow, but I dont understand why I cannot put at least one corrective move into practice, I would like to send this to my husband but he does not believe in these things.. all he knows is that I am a horrible person.

]]> Comment on The First Step to a Better Marriage by Linda Davis http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/164/the-first-step-to-a-better-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-685 Linda Davis Thu, 04 Feb 2010 01:11:41 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=164#comment-685 Very insightful post, thanks for sharing this with us. The blame game is one, if not THE, major reason why relationships go sour. To end this vicious cycle, you have to identify what you want, and not focusing on what you do not want. Try to realize what's important to you; this will help you in taking the necessary steps in recreating intimacy in relationships. Very insightful post, thanks for sharing this with us. The blame game is one, if not THE, major reason why relationships go sour. To end this vicious cycle, you have to identify what you want, and not focusing on what you do not want. Try to realize what’s important to you; this will help you in taking the necessary steps in recreating intimacy in relationships.

]]> Comment on Why Fear Makes Us Feel Neurotic by Kathleen http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/158/why-fear-makes-us-feel-neurotic/comment-page-1/#comment-681 Kathleen Sun, 24 Jan 2010 06:15:38 +0000 http://www.thecouplesinstitute.com/blog/?p=158#comment-681 It sounds like your gut is telling you to help your stepson. You are providing your stepson a wonderful role model. He might not thank you, but be assured he feels the effort and attention you give. You just might be the influence that helps him realize the importance of going to college. Although step-parenting is pretty thankless in my experience, go with your gut....you'll be able to look at yourself in the mirror and know you tried. It sounds like your gut is telling you to help your stepson. You are providing your stepson a wonderful role model. He might not thank you, but be assured he feels the effort and attention you give. You just might be the influence that helps him realize the importance of going to college. Although step-parenting is pretty thankless in my experience, go with your gut….you’ll be able to look at yourself in the mirror and know you tried.

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